May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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