I cut my penus on the lid.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You dont lie about slip and slides
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
