you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
We left an ass print on the piano.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
