he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I FOUND THE LEGS
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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