ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
