i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
