Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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