whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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