I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
We left the knife in your bed.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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