Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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