Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize