that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize