Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
