Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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