what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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