dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
he thought i was a dude.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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