No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
