i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
