summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
