I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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