And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
