The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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