im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize