By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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