just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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