i jhust puked up my retainher.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Randomize
