you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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