He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
