I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
It's never too late to be topless.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Randomize
