I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
