I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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