i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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