If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize
