he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
