im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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