think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize