I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
birth control should be required to get into college
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
