Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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