I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
