i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
