I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
