this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
