Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize