His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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