24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
