Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i think i have herpe
just one?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
