If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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