that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
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When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
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i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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