Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Randomize
