"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
