So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
